stay tuned

'For The Record': briney spears' latest documentary premiered tonight on mtv. i fucking love her, idgaf what anyone says. she's only human. she can make a complete fool of herself, handle being a single parent of two & still manage to pull it off. whatevaaaa, i think she's amazing lol.

homie i don't know,

she's hot and cold.

thanksgiving was.. eh. i was moody the whole day, blew up at my mom half way into dinner. left the house at 9pm, got to camarillo at like 10. wasn't that crowded when we first got there which was good. sales were okay. ran into jerald & vianca after waiting in line at nike for like an hour. we stood in line in front of american apparel for a bit.. fuckers were only letting in 50 at a time. successful trip overall. got home at 3am -.- too sleepy for early bird shopping. begged daddy to take me to valencia later. got a few things. now that i'm home, i should be working on my paper but i'm already way off track with school. can't focus at all anymore. jus tryna get through this year & start over. 26 days til SanFran!<3

oh! & a special thanks

to those who love me, who support me, who lift me up, who inspire me, who believe in me. no need to name names, they know who they are. i couldn't have done this without them, i couldn't have gotten to this point of finally being happy inspite of my losses. so here's to the ones who knew i had the strength to change when i couldn't find it in myself & the ones who put up with my dramatic, impatient, complaining, stubborn ass through it all. i owe them til the end of time. even when i get too busy or too wrapped up in my own thing, i never forget how much God has given me. although i sometimes take things for granted & overlook my blessings, i am constantly trying. everyone that's come into my life, whether or not they stayed, has affected me more than they know. i've learned that with forgiveness comes gratitude. so thank you, from the bottom of my heart. and to those who hurt me, who gave up on me, who broke me, thank you too. i've grown up quite a bit & i know better now than to take anything worth having for granted. & when my second chance comes around, best believe i'll make that shit work & hold on to it for as long as i can. won't disappoint this time, like i promised. i'm a stronger bitch than i used to be & as this year comes to an end, i think that's all i ever needed. xoxo.

what's up M.I.A.

ahhhh i haven't been updated with anything lately since school is officially taking over my life. but this week's okay now that the stress of it is over. can't really remember monday but..

tuesday: i hung out with heather baby! (you'd think seeing all my friends with their licenses & cars would make me more eager to finish my shit but i guess not -.-) so we chilled at her house, got all dressed up, & left for csun. got the the library, couldn't find shit. got back in her car, thought about going to another library but decided to just go to starbucks (: i swear, it's become like my second home. then saw some old friends which was fun, minus .. hahah.

wednesday: i was stressing out over my english term paper but my teacher extended the due date of everything i missed to the end of next week which fucking made my day. then after school, had boba with isabelle. missed myles' game.. again! got picked up by erin & auntie. got ready at auntie's house while eating bombass crab sandwiches (: then erin got a call from cosmo mag so she pretended to be 18 & ended up trying to win a trip to australia? hahah. then we spent another hour looking for someone to pick us up since my so called best friend, myles was too lazy! watched most of Love Actually while waiting for mario, dago, dylan, & Michard to pick us up. party was alright. i got to see everyone in ze valley i haven't seen in a while. had a few .. & .. w/ erin (: then left.

today: woke up at like 11am to some greeting texts. took a hot shower, cleaned my room & my bathroom, & watched sisterhood of the traveling pants 2 w/ my mommy hahah. surprisingly, it's actually one of the best movies i've seen in a while. i suggest you rent it if you haven't already seen it. now jus waiting for dinner, then getting ready for midnight shopping! peace bitches.

ps/ joni buan, wherever you are, find your gayass back to me! imy fag

dollar menu millionaire

mos def going on my bucket list, lmao

strong suggestion.

listography by lisa nola. urbanoutfitters, $16. i was flipping through it & 'love listography' today. they're like giant surveys haha. but they have good questions. no 'who's the last person who...' kinda shit. it really makes you think. buy a copy and find out a little more about yourself first before you let your mouths run.

a few of my favorite things

mr. president elect on haight street in SanFran.

la to the bay

i don't think i can wait another month. posted in milbrae, union square which means tree lighting + lots of shopppping, twin godsons' baptism, my favorite little ones, &the rest of my family, daily chipotle for breakfast & 24hr starbucks.. you have no idea how excited i am :)

currently

• putting off a 7pg paper due before winter break
• fed up with junior year
• getting rid of my bad attitude & potty mouth
• in need of +balance
• waiting for lock & key
• running on less than 5hrs of sleep daily
• suffering from hella insomnia
• saving $$$ for black friday & day after christmas
• excited for christmas in SanFran!
• counting the days til Feb. Valyermo (:
• addicted to vitamin water balance, yumm

passed me by

i guess the twinkle in his eye is jus a twinkle in his eye.

beautiful struggle.

although i can have my doubts, i do believe everything happens for a reason. every person, every situation, every friendship and relationship, successful or failed, is given to you for a specific purpose. to help you learn to grow, learn about yourself, learn about others, learn to love, and learn to let go. after every struggle is a happy ending. it may not always come immediately and it may not be exactly what you wanted but i've learned that time is all it takes to finally realize it and slowly learn to embrace the changes that come with it. figure out what's really important to you, hold on to it for as long as you can, and never take anything for granted. be grateful for what you have and what you once had. let go of all bitterness and anger and learn to be content and happy with yourself first. learn to accept your defeats gracefully with your head high and your eyes open, instead of with a constant feeling of grief and regret. learn to be independent instead of choosing to lean more on others. only then can you begin to love someone else fully and completely. be strong for yourself and for those who believe in you and will love you unconditionally. remember your mistakes only to make better decisions for when you are given the opportunity of a second chance and remember that the future will always hold more and greater possibilities. suck it easyyyyyyyyyy. xoxo.